It was a night like many before,

A quiet war waged behind closed doors.

The moon had hidden, stars stood still,

And I, beneath my blanket’s will and wail,

Let silent sobs soak into the threads

Of a pillow that knew all I never said.

The room was dark, no light in sight,

Only shadows to cradle me through the night.

I curled inwards, hollow and small, like a tennis ball,

Thinking, “If I vanish, would it matter at all?”

“Would anyone care at all?”

But then,

The door creaked softly, though no one knocked.

No footsteps, just light, the kind time forgot.

A soft, glowing presence filled every inch of every space,

Warmth kissed the cold from the corners of the place.

I looked up, trembling, unsure what to see,

Was it the bedtime monster my parents warned me of? Or the monsters of my brain, that no-one warned me of?

But no, he was there, walking towards me, slowly.

Like he wanted to help.

Not just light—but Noor in its truest name,

The one from Madinah, from love he came.

Rasulullah stood before my eyes,

Yet I could not meet his gaze, too divine, too holy, too wise.

Not the kind of light that hurts, blinds, or burns,

But the kind that heals, that teaches, that yearns.

Not like the light of the midday sun, but the kind of the 14th day moon.

I fell to my knees, not in sajda, no—

Because no matter how much I love him, worship is only for Ya Kareem.

Only love compelled me to bow.

I kissed his feet with tears on my face,

And he knelt too, wrapping me in grace. Into a hug that heals.

He kissed my forehead, as a father would do,

And asked, “My daughter, what burdens you? What bothers you?”

My lips trembled, I tried to hide,

But the pain I carried came pouring outside.

I told him of thoughts I was ashamed to speak,

Of dark days, of feeling endlessly weak.

I told him of battles no one ever saw,

Of pain that wrote silence into every flaw.

I explained in ways no ordinary human would understand.

Only he would.

He can see the pain in my eyes.

The one I don’t confide in.

The way others never realize.

But,

He is no ordinary man.

But his presence—Ya Allah—lifted the night,

Even before his words, my soul felt light.

Everything seemed right.

My life felt in sight.

Then he said,

“Allah loves you, my dear, with an endless love.

You are precious, you are enough, you are loved.

No thought, no sin, no ache inside,

Can strip you of the mercy that with Allah resides From Him no pain hides.”

I cried again, but not from grief,

These were tears of long-awaited relief.

He took my hands, said, “Now raise them high.

Call to your Lord, He is always nigh.”

He made a du’a, his voice soft and low, like the night that was finally slow

For me, for you, for all we know.

For us, for you, because he loved you.

Because that’s who he is: Rahmatal-lil-Alameen,

A mercy walking softly between the seen and unseen.

Mercy for you and I.

For all of humankind.

Then came the soft hues of dawn’s first light, the sun’s first sight

He said, “My daughter, I must leave with the night.”

“No! Please stay, you’ve healed my soul, in ways that can’t be told.

I’m afraid without you, I can’t be whole.”

He smiled, “You’re never alone, my child, never. Ever.

Wherever you go, I’m with you forever.

And above all, know Allah is near,

Every heartbeat, every tear, He is near.

As long as ‘La ilaha illallah’ lives in your chest,

You carry peace, and you carry the best. Your soul will forever be at rest.

‘Muhammadur Rasulullah’ your guide, your proof,

Your rope when the world steals and rips away the roof.”

And then he was gone.

Just like that.

Left me with his wise words.

But I awoke with peace.

The room still dark,

Yet my heart released, and with peace.

No darkness but peace. Freedom and love.

Peace and ease.

It was only a dream but more than it had seemed.

A sign from Allah, gentle and deep.

That I am loved.

That I am seen.

That even in the darkest night,

When only melancholy seems,

Noor can still teem.

​I will forever be seen.

By my Lord.

By my Nabi.

With every breath I take,

Every heart that beats,

Every tear I shed,

The power of noor,

The power of the holiest, purest form of love,

I will forever carry in my shell.